free lessbian sex videos An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

brad pitt nude picture Family dynamic

naked at the park Several weeks ago we were wiling away an early Sunday evening in the living room, the two of us watching the national news while Leta pretended that her Sleeping Beauty Barbie was dead. I got up to clean the kitchen just as America’s Funniest Videos was coming on, and within minutes the laughter erupting from the living room was loud enough to pull me away from a sink full of dirty dishes. I walked over to see what was going on, and there on the couch was a sea of lanky limbs, legs sprawled out on top of each other, two faces frozen in giggling so hysterical that it had crossed over into silence. This is yet another thing Leta inherited from her father, the habit of falling into a fit of laughter so hard that when it happens I don’t know if she’s laughing or dying. And in this instance if anyone had seen her contorted, silent body wedged between two couch cushions I would have had to assure them, no, she’s not dead, she just saw a video of a man accidentally setting his balls on fire.

queen sex with horse She calls it The Funny Show, and several times a day she asks how many days until Sunday, how many days until we get to see The Funny Show again. And I’ll be honest, this is thrilling for both of us because we both could sit for hours and watch videos of people crashing their bikes into trees. And now our daughter does, too? You know, I’ve seen countless videos of people swinging bats at piñatas only to miss and hit someone in the crotch, but to sit there and share that moment with my daughter is something entirely different. Especially when she narrates her perspective out loud: “Oh no, oh no… no, no, no…. DON’T DO IT, DON’T DO IT… AHHH! AHHHH! AHHHHHHH! HE FELL OVER! HE FELL OVER! Rewind it! Rewind it! I want to see him fall over again!” Yes, it’s funny because that poor man fell over, not because you could hear his testicles crunching underneath the weight of the blow.

avenue q sex scene So this has become our Sunday ritual, we all wind down after dinner by watching videos of people disfiguring themselves, and it would be perfect except for the fact that Chuck cannot handle it. For some reason he is distressed by the sound and energy of our collective laughter and will sit in the middle of the floor and shake with anxiety. Usually he only behaves this way when I cough or when Jon and I have a serious discussion, and that only started happening in the months after Leta’s birth when I was a basket case. My postpartum depression scarred him, and if I make the tiniest move where it looks like I’m even thinking about tossing a milk jug at Jon’s head, Chuck will shed his entire coat and go hide in a closet. Turns out you can’t assure a dog that you still love Daddy, it’s just sometimes you experience an irrational, unfounded need to make him bleed.

nude pics of males But our laughter sounds nothing like yelling or arguing, so we have no idea why he will climb up onto the couch in the middle of The Funny Show and physically shove his body between us to try and break up the fun. The only thing I can come up with is that this is just another one of his many neurotic sensitivities, a hunch confirmed by the dog trainer we hired to help us with Coco, someone who boarded both dogs over the Thanksgiving holiday and got to experience Chuck’s neuroses first hand. She’s been training dogs for over ten years and has never before encountered anything so emotionally delicate as Chuck and told us that we’d been having so much trouble with Coco because we’d never before lived with a normal dog. Coco, she said, could let go. Chuck, on the other hand, would remember the kid in first grade who stole his fruit roll-up and then twenty years later open fire in a mall because he was still mad about it.

trish stratus in porno Coco is a dog. Chuck is a cat. And considering the multitude and nature of things we have put on his head, it will be no mystery if one of us goes missing.

pamela anderson lesbian video 244 Comments
  • lisa raye naked pics

    sex scenes in caligula 2009/01/12 at 3:41 pm

    sunny lane porn tube OK, so “The Funny Show” thing is, well, funny … because recently, we were at my mother’s Christmas party, and my 5-year-old son and his 5-year-old second cousin were playing with some action figures and what not, so we left them upstairs playing … and when I went back a short while later they were naked and acting goofy and saying that what they were doing was called “The Funny Show.”

    your free amatuer porn I quickly slipped into Les Moonves mode and canceled that show.

  • Dana

    kim kardashing sex tape 2009/01/12 at 3:41 pm

    xxx free sex porno Not to change the subject, but please tell me you saw this on Kottke: my sexy sister porn

    red haired naked women I can’t find a bucket big enough to catch the projectile vomit I am now stricken with.

  • sex free on line

    hef's new girlfriends nude 2009/01/12 at 3:41 pm

    finding a sex partner I love your site. And I was excited to see 0 comments! Could I be the first?

  • licking pussy free videos

    top mature porn sites 2009/01/12 at 3:42 pm

    teen killed by gang Dogs and cats and humans all behave in mysterious ways. That’s all I know. 🙂

  • Emily Joyner

    sexy girl showing pussy 2009/01/12 at 3:42 pm

    pussy cat doll costume I love it. My 2-year-old English Bulldog (Dorsey) sounds an awful lot like Chuck. I’m convinced that no one’s told her she’s a dog!

  • steffi graf nude photo

    diane lane sex vids 2009/01/12 at 3:43 pm

    hardcore porn sites free I wish we did silent laughter. My family veers into snorting if you really get us laughing hard. My sister loves to make me snort.

  • Zoe, in Ireland

    free ass licking lesbian 2009/01/12 at 3:43 pm

    nude on beach videos Just wanted to comment because I have never seen your comments under 100 before. And I wanted to say that you are not alone in wondering whether your daughter came out of your womb or not. People have told me, and still do in fact, that I was obviously just the incubator. Good times.
    Oh, and you think being newly pregnant was shitty, try doing it while holding onto a 9 month old and a 2.5 year old. What the hell happened?

  • Nancy

    vennesa hudgens nude photos 2009/01/12 at 3:46 pm

    free prego porn pics So, this is where my cat’s neuroses ended up…you know – the cat I have who thinks he is a dog? The one who plays fetch, “barks” at the door, begs for treats – but stops short of eating his own poop – thank goodness. I was going to offer to trade – but I think I will just keep the bizarre behavior – identity crisis and all.

  • 3 some sex pics

    ass teen mouth movies 2009/01/12 at 3:46 pm

    crissy moran porn eskimo I think it’s a bit harsh to imply that Chuck’s quirks are shared by all, or even most, cats. There are plenty of non-neurotic cats out there. Not that I own any of them — my three are some of the most bizarrely wired mammals you’ll ever meet in your life — but I have met a few and they’re perfectly fine. Neurosis is as neurosis does.

    brother in law porn And if Coco is like a normal dog, I think I’ll stick with cats, all things considered.

  • teen on the phone

    the fairly oddparents sex 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    teen boys with girls I will sit on the couch with hubbie and watch the funny show and cry with laughter….and then fall into fits of silent laughter. While crying. He just sits there and watches me. Rolling his eyes.

  • jennifer lopez sex vedio

    free cheerleader sex pics 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    black male porn stars Oh, Chuck. At least he’s got a steady hand with the eyeliner.

  • Chuk

    free sex movies dvd 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    cassie leaked nude photo We just got a standard Australian Shepherd puppy. We only had cats before. She does this all day (well, during the parts of the day when she isn’t trying to chew on my everything):

    doing sex during pregnancy free porn sex free

    online sex multiplayer games Our brains are going to explode.
    I may need the name of your dog trainer.

  • Anonymous

    bbw big booty porn 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    african american male nude My daughter loved that show too except she called it “America’s FUN videos”.

    online sex sim game Poor Chuck.

  • top 10 porn website

    lesbian prison sex video 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    hot lesbian sex vidios I’m posting mostly because I’m in the top 10–whoa!–and because I wonder sometimes if I might love my dog Fozzie more than my people (family).

  • women spreading their pussy

    hardcore free porn video 2009/01/12 at 3:49 pm

    rape videos free porn Thank the Lord. I though MY kids were the only ones rivetted into soundless hysterics by Funniest Home Videos. Dash will NOT let me change the channel when even the most DISTURBING clips are on. Neither will my husband.

    close up hardcore sex The whole Chuck thing is interesting… I don’t have a house pet (anymore) but our Great Dane hated it when we “debated” and would come and stand directly between us. Hard to maintain the higher ground when one is being leant on by an 80kg dog…
    🙂
    BB

  • best black porn star

    dakota fanning nude pics 2009/01/12 at 3:51 pm

    nude teens in lingerie Well, I thought I was in the top 10 but between writing and hitting ‘submit’ I got bumped.

    mejor pagina de porno Still love my dog just as much, though. 😉

  • melissa midwest nude pictures

    lauren conrad naked pics 2009/01/12 at 3:53 pm

    miss california nude pics I’m commenting solely because I’ve never EVER been in the tens – only the 100s and normally the 1000s if I comment here.

    pregnant through anal sex I love you all, even if you are dog lovers.

    free porn video blogs That is all.

  • LA in OK

    sex porno video free 2009/01/12 at 3:53 pm

    what makes sex pleasurable Thanks #11… I’ve wondered if that really WAS eyeliner on Chuck on occasion, or if it was just the lighting!

  • dessessopsid

    rachelle leah nude video 2009/01/12 at 3:53 pm

    old woman porn movie Is just good to know that someone else has a dog that is so very cat like too…

  • most expensive sex toys

    videos porno de modelos 2009/01/12 at 3:55 pm

    cum dripping hairy pussy I love AFV too! I sometimes laugh so hard I cry or can’t breath…thankfully we have dvr so we can pause while I catch my breath back up to normal (or go to the bathroom, if you know what I mean). 🙂

    keri hilson nude pic I’m so happy you all love the show too…the fact that Leta narrates the happenings makes me smile – a lot.

    free porn for ladies Poor Chuck – please hug him when he’s so stressed. Or give him earmuffs.

  • Becki

    free porn with midgets 2009/01/12 at 3:56 pm

    free milf sex pics AFV is one of our family’s favorite shows too. Although, for the past 3 years I’ve been trying to get my daughter to call it AFV. But she seems to prefer “America’s Homest Funniest Homest Videos.”

    free porn facial abuse We’ve got a very neurotic dog too – she does the same thing. She sits in front of the TV facing us and shakes and wears an expression of severe torture. You’d think that, with every guffaw, we were beating her severely. When my dad is around her, he yells “Why can’t you act like a normal dog? Just be a dog.”

  • Solarjoles

    free animated porn tube 2009/01/12 at 3:57 pm

    hot nude punk girls If it makes you feel any better, Dino, my 90lb Dobie, shakes with anxiety too. All the time. Especially when there are cats around, since he knows he’s not allowed to chase them, but they are SOOOO tempting.

    high heel porn sites It’s better than the licking, though…the constant licking of his back leg until it bleeds. I have to promise everyone that no, I don’t abuse my dog, he just needs more Valium.

  • Lori

    kama sutra porn movie 2009/01/12 at 3:57 pm

    ebony lesbians porn videos My son (5) also calls it “The Funny Show”! I have to admit that it is one of our Sunday evening staples and I am frequently laughing so hard that I’m crying. It freaks my dog out too and I think I may have discovered the answer. On the National Geographic Channel there was recently a program entitled “In the Womb: Dogs” at one point they mentioned that dogs with red hair are more like to worry and be easier to upset. Guess what I have… a red haired labradoodle.

  • Ronna

    hot emo porn vids 2009/01/12 at 3:59 pm

    real sex doll pics Sounds a lot like my dog. Chuck isn’t part Chihuahua is he?

  • Britte S.

    miss maryland outstanding teen 2009/01/12 at 3:59 pm

    joclyn stone free porn My dog, Major, is a lot like Chuck. He was badly abused as a pup and I rescued him when he was 6 months old. He’s almost 2 now and is finally over the majority of his fear of feet. We still have bags, newspapers, boxes, anything that resembles a bat when rolled up, and Ramen noodles to conquer (I’m not sure how that fear came about, but god forbid I take out a packet of Ramen noodles in his presence). He actually looks a lot like Chuck if Chuck was chocolate coloured and had a Bubba (from Forest Gump) like underbite.

    meg ryan vintage porn My family and I are very very careful to stay away from him when we argue because otherwise he’ll go into shakes and try to either shove his body between the people arguing or he’ll try to shove himself under the couch. Although funny to watch, it breaks my heart to know he’s get affected by it that badly.

  • Marshall

    cameroon diaz sex scene 2009/01/12 at 3:59 pm

    high quality porn photos Have you introduced Leta to “Jackass” yet?

  • free naked petite women

    pornstars with hairy pussy 2009/01/12 at 3:59 pm

    people having sex hard “Emotionally delicate”? Did you tell her you write about Chuck online for millions of people to read? Because I’m willing to bet a therapist would blame you, so maybe a dog trainer would too. 😛

  • free sex you tube

    nude girls in sports 2009/01/12 at 3:59 pm

    jennifer anniston naked pics Thank you for the laughter.

    angela taylor nude pics Your humorous account of Chuck’s behavior reminds me of my dog Scooter.

    teen jobs in riverside Scooter was a german shepard/cocker spaniel, you think Chuck’s got issues. My dog looked like a minature german shepard but thought she was a lap dog. Had the brain power of a cocker spaniel and would kill birds, bring them into the house and never sit still. She was an odd dog.

    teen african american hairstyles I’m definitely impressed that you are able to get Chuck to sit still long enough to balance a myriad of things on his head.

  • Christine

    pictures of granny pussy 2009/01/12 at 4:00 pm

    male twins in porn OMG.. our pup acts just like Chuck. We call Ollie our “emo son” mainly because he doesn’t believe he’s a dog. Once our daughter was born, the emo factor increased ten-fold. Our favourite is his ability to learn and copy baby by crying — in an overly-dramatic way–in order to get our attention. And if the 3 humans are having a good time, he’ll come over all sad and pitiful looking and then is sure to position himself between the 3 of us. Or he’ll sit on the baby as much as he can without getting in trouble (i.e. without crushing her. he’s a standard schnauzer — heavy, but too heavy). His life must be rougher than we thought b/c having a bed in our bedroom, going to dog camp, taking a part in my walks with baby every day and going to the dog park just isn’t enough.

    adult sex tube sites Ahhh… but we love our furry, 4-legged children.

  • free sex clips lesbians

    terri hatcher sex scene 2009/01/12 at 4:01 pm

    free porn games 3d RE: Britte S from comment #25-
    I’m so sorry your dog was abused (seriously, that’s horrendous) BUT OMG RAMEN?! We can agree that’s hysterical, right?

    full figure nude models Maybe he’d prefer another brand — Cup Noodle, perhaps? ;P

  • eliza dushku sex scene

    hot sexy celebs nude 2009/01/12 at 4:04 pm

    daisy marie nude videos 1. If there was a cult dedicated to AFV, I’d be a charter member and you could always count on me for the Kool-Aid.

    nikki price sex video 2. Our daughter Mad (1 yr) has already started laughing at any video that includes a baby. As long as it isn’t her. That freaks her out.

    sandy sweet porn video 3. Our dog Zoie barks incessantly as I laugh hysterically because I am pretty sure she is trying to help keep my blood pressure down. That doesn’t necessarily help.

    tiny toon adventures porn 4. I am 19 weeks pregnant with our 2nd little girl. I laugh so hard I pee. Even if I just peed…and my husband thinks this is funnier than the “Funny Show” could ever be.

  • Jonnelle

    the hard sex tube 2009/01/12 at 4:07 pm

    hidden camera massage sex That poor cat/dog!!! My cat thought he was a dog and he would chase me around and “bark” at new people. I miss that cat. But congrats on the baby! And now there will be 4 lanky people on the couch having laughing fits on Sundays! Chuck may just start hiding under the couch like a cat.

  • Lizzy

    teen girls masterbating movies 2009/01/12 at 4:09 pm

    lesbian naked sex video When cats, and apparently Chuck, fill out worksheets on Career Day, all signs point to Postal Worker. I know this because I have two cats and I see the way they look at me.

  • free video toon sex

    nude photos of ashanti 2009/01/12 at 4:09 pm

    free babysitter porn vids This is hilarious, because it is a ritual for my family to watch this show on Sundays too. My husband, 10yr old son, and 16mth old daughter all sit to watch it, but the only problem is that while we are laughing, my little daughter is crying and acting like Chuck 🙂 Instead of joining in in the laughter, she actually gets frightened. She mistakes the screams and laughter for arguing and crying?!?! Still baffles us too.

  • porn cell phone pics

    christian perspective on sex 2009/01/12 at 4:11 pm

    job for sex offenders My aunt’s dog (little brown poodle) was fine if either my aunt or my uncle was in the room, but if they were both in the room at the same time, she hid under the table. Intelligent dog.

  • jane

    free phone sex video 2009/01/12 at 4:11 pm

    free mature pussy tube My husband and I watch that show and laugh like buffoons, only in my house I’m the one gasping and saying, “Rewind it!” Our son is 4 months old and I can’t wait to enjoy it with him; he seems to think my husband is hilarious (apparently mom has to work on her material a bit more) so I’m hoping he shares our sensibility! Thanks for giving me another thing to look forward to with the baby.

  • Anonymous

    videos porno en dd 2009/01/12 at 4:12 pm

    sex offenders locator map Heather,

    rate my porn video Just wanted you to know, I dig, dig, dig your blog. We’re not a worlds funniest home video family, however my son cannot get enough of anything Indiana Jones. He hums the theme song twenty four/seven. We’re a dog family. Two of them. Huge galumphing dogs. Sometimes I think I should just move out of my own bed the way everyone/thing piles on. Check out my blog: hutchfoster.blogspot.com.

    teen fucked in school Hutch

  • Emily

    free category porn videos 2009/01/12 at 4:14 pm

    boy sex with aunt My kids and I watch The Funny Show every afternoon (at 5:00 Eastern). We laugh until our sides hurt, and I can’t tell you how much good it has already done for us.

    silk spectre 2 naked My dogs don’t hate it, though. They’re used to us behaving like morons.

  • Adrienne

    amisha patel sex scene 2009/01/12 at 4:18 pm

    tiny girl porn movies Poor Chuck.
    And thank god we never had a dog growing up. (Although, I did have two gerbils, one named Chuck as a matter of fact.) My little brother would laugh so hard and loud at AFHV that we thought he would have a stroke at the ripe old age of six. My other brother and I didn’t think the show was funny, but the insane laughter, *that* was funny.

  • pussy cat dolls costumes

    black milf sex videos 2009/01/12 at 4:19 pm

    tight pussy free pics You know that part when they paste the host’s head onto other peoples bodies? That part scares the crap out of my 2 year old son. He turns to me, climbs up on my lap and burries his head. I still watch the show though.

  • Denise

    sex with tom cruise 2009/01/12 at 4:19 pm

    malin akerman sex clips Poor Chuck. Your dogs sound exactly like mine only with the sexes reversed. We have a 9 year old female neurotic red mutt and a 2 year old little boy aussie. Our red dog will run and hide when we raise or voices and shakes uncontrollably in a car, around loud noises etc. We blame the hubbies mormon mother on the neurosis though 🙂

  • teen clubs in az

    breast milk sex videos 2009/01/12 at 4:21 pm

    free porn tube shemale I still love Chuck – even if he is a neurotic mess.

  • Anonymous

    nude hot asian women 2009/01/12 at 4:21 pm

    hidden camera wife sex My Rot/Lab cross is wary of all small rodents. She’s not afraid, I don’t think, just would rather not have the little balls of fur trying to sniff her feet.

    who has more sex It’s fun to stick the dog and two guinea pigs into a small space and watch the dog fidget. I’m a nice person, really.

  • Anonymous

    teen first big cock 2009/01/12 at 4:21 pm

    kristina fey nude pics Chuck is delightful.
    I have a labrador who acts like that.
    It might be Chucks neurotic labrador retriever roots showing.

  • forced sex with babysitter

    celebrity male nude pictures 2009/01/12 at 4:22 pm

    free julia bond porn So, affection for crotch shots and bike crashes aside, our daughters could definitely be friends, or 85 year old convalescent home frenemies trapped in 5 year old bodies. If I am not forced ‘to attend a barbie funeral, or risky amputation with rusty scissors, I am role-playing as a husband while she announces her new-found pregnancy. How do you appropriately respond when your 5 year old daughter exclaims, “Honey, I’m pregnant. Aren’t you excited?”

  • jennifer love hewlett naked

    the first porn video 2009/01/12 at 4:23 pm

    pics of naked couples My four year old also loves it and calls it “Silly Things”. Those two remind me much of each other, Leta and Jack. It must be the four thing and the neurotic thing (and the reading obsession, and the crazy eating habits…)
    🙂

  • clone wars toon porn

    7 inch penis porn 2009/01/12 at 4:23 pm

    free 3d animated sex Poor sensitive Chuckles!

    lynn mccrossin free porn If my husband raises his voice for, say, a football game, one of our pups, The Zali Lama, will saunter over to him and give him a full on head tilt, movie star smooch.

    why men have sex We’re all dysfunctional. We’re over it.

    free lesbien porn sites Congrats on the team expansion!

  • Jen

    full and free porn 2009/01/12 at 4:24 pm

    halle berry lesbian kiss I love America’s Funniest Home videos. And you’re right, it’s funny to watch alone, but when you find someone to watch it with, it’s even funnier!

  • Jill

    older women younger teen 2009/01/12 at 4:24 pm

    ask a sex question I have a neurotic dog AND a psychotic cat, and a six year old boy who has loved the Funny Show since he was three. Now if only I can get him to quit hitting himself in his crotch, as he thinks it’ll make him a tv star…

    free hentai lesbian clips thanks for your blog – you rock!

  • ultimate guide to sex

    miley cyrus in naked 2009/01/12 at 4:27 pm

    teen boy on boy My dog has a very similar sensitive manner. If I clip his nails, he doesn’t want me to touch/cuddle him for a week or more. Or if something scarred him at a point of our walk, he will remember the spot and skitter around it. He ran into a rattle snake a few months back, and still thinks every stick or mud clump is a rattle snake. Ohhh, our sensitive little guys…it doesn’t help that this kind of sensitive dog makes it even easier to humanize him…It can’t be helped.

big boobs naked video ashley massaro naked photos 1 drunk and naked pics full anime porn videos teen loves old man … undress naked girls games

boys sex with mom

Heather B. Armstrong

young russian girls porn Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

short haired women porn selena gomez pictures nude

teen chat 13 17 free sex movie online Savethe most sexiest sex Save